On Being a Housewife

My subtitle for this blog is “Tales of an Aspiring Housewife.” I was thinking about that the other day, and feeling like maybe I should explain the meaning behind that phrase. You see, I am not really a housewife in the truest sense of the word. Being a housewife implies that you are not employed outside of the home, that your “job” is taking care of a household, your spouse, and possibly a family. Some people would argue that “housewives” are out of fashion; the modern woman can balance a career and family effortlessly. Sometimes, the word is even met with derision as people formulate their own opinions and scornfully synonimize it with laziness. Personally, I think that women everywhere are wondering why their full-time careers and day-care supported lifestyles are unfulfilling. I’m certainly not saying that all women should quit their jobs and be home full-time with their children, but I am suggesting that maybe, for some of us, the dreams of getting women out of the kitchen and into the workforce have gone too far.



You may wonder what I back up my statements with. The truth is, I don’t have charts and statistics to refer you to. What I know is solely based on interactions with other women, and personal experience. I work a full-time job. I spend 50 hours a week are driving, working, and frankly, wishing I am somewhere else. When I get home, my husband takes priority, and my household is usually in need of more attention than I can give. As much as I would like to love my job, for me it has always been just a way to earn a living. I graduated from college with a degree in music- vocal performance to be specific. My early years were spent practicing piano and planning to be a famous pianist like my Grandfather. Then I went to college and discovered a love for singing and changed my focus to a career in opera. With the support of my college faculty, after graduating I planned to throw myself into a graduate degree in Opera, and see where that would take me. But (there’s always a big but isn’t there!) that was not God’s plan for me.



Instead, He led me to a decision to take a couple of years off and pay down some of my student loans. Then, He led me to a full-time job with the government (the best paying option that I found), where I met and started dating an amazing man named… Josh. 2 years later, I am happily married and my career in opera is far removed from daily thoughts.



I wrote a while ago about the hardship of letting go of dreams, so I won’t delve into that here. Suffice to say, I no longer have a desire to pursue that kind of lifestyle. Don’t get me wrong, I still love singing and I’m actually planning a career move into that direction soon. But it won’t involve bright lights, stage makeup, and tiny microphones taped to my forehead. As much as I love performing, that lifestyle just doesn’t appeal to me anymore. The kind of satisfaction that I get from cooking a meal for my husband, taking care of my little home, and creating a peaceful, beautiful environment just can’t be matched by hours spent in a practice room, or even getting on a stage and singing my heart out. Instead, I find myself longing to be first and foremost a wife, a caretaker, and hopefully someday soon, a mother.



What does my ideal Inner Housewife look like? Well, she certainly doesn’t lounge around in sweats, watching Soap Operas and eating Bon-Bons all day, because only someone like Zsa Zsa Gabor could find fullfillment in that kind of lifestyle. She doesn’t wear frilly aprons and kitten heels while she cooks meatloaf and cleans, and she doesn’t immediately rub her husband’s feet when he gets home from work (unless he asks nicely and then returns the favor!).



Maybe she works 10 hours or so a week doing something she loves, and then has time to spend playing with her children and cooking delicious meals. Maybe she volunteers at a women’s shelter one day a week, or devotes time to blogging and maintaining relationships with friends and family.



One thing I do know for sure, is that whatever she does is glorifying to the God who made her. So that’s why I’m an “Aspiring Housewife.” I’m aspiring to be more than just a federal employee, and a day-care mom. I’m aspiring to be a creative, organized, loving, family-oriented, innovative, hard-working Housewife. And I’m really glad that you are coming along for the journey…

As always, I would absolutely love to hear your thoughts. Have you felt these same feelings? Do you aspire to be a modern Housewife? Or if you already are, what led you to that decision?